A four letter word

My sweet five-year-old baby boy.

My adorable brown-eyed, long-lashed, dimpled baby boy.

This sweet, cute, lovable, cuddly baby boy has a favorite word.


Actually, a favorite subject.


Apparently, any business (in a five-year-old mind) that goes on in the “unmentionable” area is fair game for conversation. Now, don’t get me wrong, some potty-humor is funny. The first thousand times. You can only hear a farting sound so many times before it makes you want to strangle the sweet little face that’s making it.  At first, it was just replacing strategic words in conversation.

 Like “Mommy, can I have hotdog and  a butt for lunch?”

Or in commercials for the auto parts store on the radio, “O, o, o, o’reilly…auto-farts”

But – no pun intended – you know it’s getting out of hand when he tells perfect strangers, “Wanna see my butt –while sticking it out to them?” or “You have a big, fat butt –insert fart sound.” or ” I had butt for lunch” and finally “I wanna marry your butt.”  That last one he told my best friend, Amy, who was really no help in the matter since she was telling him how her butt was cuter than his butt and laughing hysterically as he made all his fake (and real) fart sounds.  Thanks, dearie…paybacks are hell.

I have tried to replace some words like, booty for butt, toot for fart and private for pee-pee and just plain outlawing diarrhea.  Except when he refers to Diarrhea of a Wimpy Kid, that one I just can seem to correct.  Oh well.  He gets it honest.

 Only 2 1/2 months until Kindergarten.

 My apologies in advance.


About KimB

I am a mommy to 3 wild and wonderful boys, wife to my husband. I am a stay-at-home mommy, who would like to work if the perfect job came along. Trying to find a way to make money from home so we can have more of the "wants" not just the "needs". We live in the sort of-country and have a pretty big garden, but no animals, except one small, dark, and furry dacshund.
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5 Responses to A four letter word

  1. Diane Turner says:

    Wait until he is 13 and follows you around the supermarket holding a 15″ salami to the front of his pants. Being a mom to boys is never dull…sigh

    • KimB says:

      Oh I know. I have older sons, but so far this one is the polar opposite from them in behavior. He’s the baby and momma is a little worn down I guess.

  2. As a Mom of two boys, I feel your pain and share your laughter! Sometimes it is hard to correct them when you are trying not to laugh hysterically! (came via Findingthefunny)

  3. I have a blue tongue. My kids are under orders to swear appropriately. My husband keeps waiting for this method to fail. He thought he had me on the day Sam’s preschool teacher said, “Sam was using a little potty language today.”

    The word in question? Butt. Specifically, the biggest insult he can manufacture is “Baby butt” spoken in this outrageously sassy voice.

    • KimB says:

      Glad to hear I’m not the only one out there that thinks that if they hear it all the time it takes away a little of the “excitement” of using all those really bad words. I mean it’s not SwearFest all the time but they do hear a few choice words that their Sunday school teacher would definately NOT approve of.

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